WHO do You TRUST Yourself AS? DAY 113

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Bernard Poolman, Desteni Group, integrity, mind and body, Nietzsche, Saving the earth, self trust, self-integrity, Who do you trust, who do you trust yourself as

“Whoever despises himself still respects himself as one who despises.”

– Friedrich Nietzsche

This is in continuation to:

Oops, You Missed a Spot! DAY 112

Bad Cop vs. Pure Evil: DAY 111

Staff Sargent F.E.A.R Thomsen: DAY 110

Wrestling Imaginary Alligators of the Mind: DAY 109

Becoming a Person of Integrity: DAY 102

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to deliberately procrastinate points that I KNOW and SEE require direction and thus do nothing but accumulate consequences for myself and for everyone else simply because I am giving myself the CHOICE to not do that which is required because I DON’T WANT TO in and through which I am declaring that I am the most important thing in the universe – in fact the only important thing and not even me as my physical body but me as a delusional mind-entity that exists only to survive in/as it’s illusional existence that I have abdicated myself to

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that I haven’t developed self-integrity because ‘I am not a person of integrity’ and thereby blame me not living in/as self-integrity on ‘life’ and ‘biology’ and ‘genes’ and ‘my mother’ and ‘god’ when the fact of the matter is that the only reason why I have not lived in/as self-integrity within/as myself is because I’ve decided NOT to and thus have made up the excuse that ‘it’s just who I am’ to in fact justify why I am not living in/as self-integrity from and within a starting-point of honoring life in equality and oneness as what is best for all

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize or understand that I HAVE in fact lived in/as self-integrity – but it was ‘integrity’ from the perspective of me ‘making a deal with the devil’ within/as abdicating myself to the mind so that I could separate myself from myself and externalize myself and not face or take responsibility for the consequences of my creation where I would be loyal to myself as the mind because I, through the mind could get what I wanted which was to use this existence, the physical and my body to get energetic experiences and as such how and as who I’ve lived ‘integrity’ as loyalty to/as the mind has been within and as consistently ensuring that I would remain in/as the mind and within accepting myself as ‘whole’ only in/as the mind while entirely disregarding the physical as existence, this world and my physical body

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to undermine my own authority within and as walking the directive decision to change myself from a human being of self-interest and separation to a human being that cares about all life and that lives based on the principle of giving as I would like to receive and of that which is best for all – and thus within and as this confirm myself as mind-authority through giving value, validation and legitimacy to the mind’s wants/needs and desires in wanting energetic experiences at all costs

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize or understand that the reason why I can’t trust myself to be in the best interest of all, is because I’ve accepted and allowed myself to place all my trust in the mind and in the mind’s wants/needs and desire

I see, realize and understand that integrity means to consistently – and thus absolutely – apply and live according to a principle and that I decide whether this is integrity of deciding to remain existing as a mind-system in and as separation from this physical existence, the earth and my body where the consequences of my decision is the total destruction, annihilation and abuse of myself as life – or whether I decide to develop a self-integrity in honoring life in/as the physical as that which has never been honored or regarded by me, but that in fact has always been here supporting me unconditionally and so the self-integrity as the decision to stand up as life is the consistency of application of the principle of ‘give as you would like to receive’ in living in all ways that which is best for all life

I see, realize and understand that integrity means to be sound/whole in the totality of my construction as a being and as such for me to stand within and as and live in self-integrity means to bring the parts of and as myself that I’ve separated myself into and as so that I do in fact stand sound/whole within and as myself in consistently applying myself in every moment as what is best for all – and until I do, dedicate myself and every moment to bring myself back to myself

I see, realize and understand that for me to in fact develop, live and stand in/as self-integrity I must apply myself consistently because one point of deliberate sabotage or compromise or procrastination compromises my self-integrity, exactly as a house cannot be completely stable if one beam is rotten and thus it is simply a matter of time before the house will collapse

I commit myself to develop self-integrity as the decision to stand up as life in equality and oneness with what is here in stepping out of the mind and into the physical and bring the parts of/as myself that I’ve separated myself into/as – and thus abdicated self-responsibility for to run rampart on my permission at the demise of all of existence – back to myself so that I can direct them in common sense to what is best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to control myself – as a thwarted version of ‘self-direction’ where I act out of fear that I can’t trust myself to direct myself here, when in fact I show myself deliberately in the decisions I make whether I can trust myself or not – and thus I fear that I can’t trust myself because I in fact know that I can’t trust myself – because I’ve not made the decision to change what I trust – who I trust myself as – and what I consistently apply myself according to in and as self-integrity

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to hold onto the belief that I can’t trust myself and that I have confirmed and validated and enunciated this belief for myself through participating within and as backchat in my mind as an internal conversation where I say to myself that I can’t trust myself and that I am an untrustworthy human being

I see, realize and understand that I’ve used the belief that I can’t trust myself as a point of self-manipulation through which I’ve made myself feel better about the fact that I can’t trust myself and thus make myself look innocent to my mind’s eye in saying to myself that “At least I know that I can’t trust myself and then take measures of control to ensure I don’t do harm” and that “I am SO self-honest that I can admit that I can’t be trusted. That’s at least something.” And so through this belief I’ve in fact limited myself to only accept myself as untrustworthy and to accept and legitimize that I have accepted myself as untrustworthy and thus created a backdoor where I could excuse and justify myself instead of in fact making the decision to change myself and change as ‘who’ and how I trust myself

I see realize and understand that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to perpetuate self-distrust – which is in fact trusting the mind and thus trusting and validating my own self-abdication and as such that by making the directive decision to trust myself – I am making the decision to change myself and as such step out of the mind and that is exactly what I as the mind have been deliberately sabotaging through accepting that I can’t trust myself to stand up and live what is best for all

I see, realize and understand that to stand up and live that which is best for all – is a directive decision that only I can make for myself – and that’s it.

When and as I see, that I am participating in backchat as an internal conversation where I say to myself that I can’t trust myself or where I activate memories of how I could not trust myself in the past, I stop. I breathe and I bring myself back here to my physical body.

I commit myself to stop distrusting myself to stand up – as I see, realize and understand that it is up to me to change my direction in the moment of application – to change what I trust, who I trust myself as, the integrity of consistency that I’ve decided to stand in and as – from self-interest to life – within and as changing who I am and how I participate from self-interest acting only according to my mind’s desires and fears to acting based on the principle of what is best for all as giving as I would like to receive

I commit myself to let go of the belief/acceptance that I can’t be trusted/am not trustworthy because I see, realize understand that I within that am making the directive statement and decision to trust the mind.

I commit myself to let go of the belief that I must control my way out of the mind, through and within which I am in fact indicating to myself my acceptance – and direction of myself to be inferior to the mind and in fact superior as the mind

I see, realize and understand that the only way to step out of the mind and to stop allowing the mind to be the directive principle of and as me, the authority of and as me, that which I trust and trust myself as and that which I stand within loyalty and integrity in/as – through practical directive application of changing myself, which I can only do in real-time moments of participation, application and breath – and which I can also only measure in real-time and which I can in fact only clearly see in real-time – in the menial and details of who I am in my participation

I commit myself to push through all experiences of resistance in immediacy as I see them emerging and as I do so, build and develop myself within and as self-integrity and self-trust

I commit myself to develop the self-trust to trust myself

I commit myself to change/direct/correct myself within and as the menial moments of my daily participation and to change all these points, point by point, writing by writing, breath by breath, until I’ve stood equal to and have directed myself in self-responsibility and are simply here directing myself immediately in the moment.

Give yourself the daily gift of reading the blogs from Creation’s Journey to Life, Earth’s Journey to Life and Heaven’s Journey to Life. Join us at Desteni, where a forum is available 24/7 with support on how to write oneself out in self-honesty and where any questions regarding the Desteni Material will be answered by competent Destonians who are walking their own process. Visit the Destonian Network where videos and blogs are streamed daily. Suggest to also check out the Desteni I Process and Relationship  courses for extended training and support. Walk with us in implementing an Equal Money System as a new System on Earth based on Equality as what is Best for All. Let’s Walk!

Related articles

• Becoming a Person of Integrity: DAY 102
• Gluttony: DAY 107
• The Science of Thought – Part 1: DAY 150
• Character Time Resonance Dimensions – Part 2: DAY 128
• Day 147: Followers
• We Are The World – We Eat The World: DAY 108
• Thoughts: Pixels of the Screen of the Mind – Part 2: DAY 146

 

 

 

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The Game of Survival – Inequality Equations and Miss-Calculations

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Business, Cameroun, Capitalist, Career, Casino, Choice, Choices, Corporations, Earth, Elections, Equality, Equation, Equations, Europe, Free Will, Game, Game Theory, Games, Globalization, God, Governments, Humanity, Ignorance, Inequality, Jesus, Mathematics, Middle Class, Money, Nietzsche, Nigeria, Parents, Poleticians, Politcs, Poverty, Qualification, Socialist, Sociology, Solution, starvation, Suffering, Survival, The Human Race, The system, Thinkers, Ulrich Beck, USA, Work, world

Most of the ‘great thinkers’ throughout history have seen parts of this, hinted and circled these points like vultures for truth and reason. But it has become the norm to either avoid setting Principles before preference, to allow ‘free-will’ to ‘run it’s course’ – or to set norms that are constructed with flaws of abdication of Self-Responsibility, placing faith in ‘higher powers’. But if we start a calculation by making one plus one three, suddenly three plus three becomes eight and so whatever we do, will be miss-calculated – every single calculation from then on out, will be flawed.

Thus Nietzsche had a point, when he called for a re-evaluation of all values – of the courage to Face ourselves within the Self-Delusion that we have Allowed to become the very ‘foundation’ of ourselves. Only then can we be able to begin making decisions that are based on Principles before preference, where we Dare to Will ourselves to Stand by these Principles no matter what. All morals that have existed so far, has been inherently immoral, therein lays the flaw and the miss-calculation. We have not Considered Life and from there seen what is required to be done, but have placed ‘more’ value and ‘less’ value, making ourselves the judges of Life, yet abdicating the Responsibility for the decisions we have made within that process – and more specifically, not Daring to Face the fact, that we might have made a mistake within the course of the ‘progress’ that we call ‘evolution’.

Ulrich Beck also has a point when he calls for a Cosmopolitical Global community that dares making local politics Global, which does not only mean for the System of governments, but for the governing of ourselves as well. Within the current system, we are existing in separate well-defined boxes as nation-states and personalities bound to these nation-states, in separate projects that we call ‘a life of our own’. But around us already exists a Global system with the ability to get in anywhere, to move anywhere, to move anyone and to direct the course we collectively take without any foundation in political decisions based on Common Sense Principles and Considerations of What is Best for the Whole of Earth. They seem to be having ‘a life of their own’, yet behind every move made, are Human Beings.

This system functions only within the Acceptance of all of us in it, through the belief that no matter who you are, you have a fair chance. But when you are born chained to the debt of your parents, your country or your continent, the prospects of ‘a fair chance’, equal to someone else in a prosperous situation, is virtually non-existing. Yet we have used this belief to justify the Suffering that we have Allowed and to hide within ourselves the deep dissatisfaction that we too are living only to survive.

From Canada to Cameroon, for each of us finance is about our private lives, earning a living, feeding our children, buying a home. But for some, finance is a game – a game that only they know how to play, a game where it is other people’s money that is at stake. It is a game of speculation, of digits jumping off screens and into the pockets of those fortunate enough to know the rules of the game.

The problem is that each of us, the one’s that worry about our mortgage, about college tuition for our kids, about providing bread on the table the next day, and the next, are not aware that we are part of the game, that we are game pieces, the pawns and ducks and that it is our personal finance that makes up the game board, from which the lucky few have their laugh.

We do not see that we are connected, that we together without knowing it, provide the bolts that make the wheels of the game of finance keep turning. We are all a part of it, from New York to Nigeria – but for some the stakes are higher than for others – some play the parts of the constant losers, generation after generation depleted and exploited: natural resources, education, health-care, clean drinking water and the ability to make a living. Others play the part of the middle-class, the masses of endless consumption, who more willingly take their part in the game, because they might, they might get a shot of getting ahead, of securing their future, of being the one’s that get to play – and win. The secret that no one has told us and that we couldn’t figure out for ourselves because we didn’t know the rules of the game, is that we are playing whether we like it or not, whether we are aware of it or not. And it is within each of us, playing for ourselves, for our own lives that this secret lays. Because we believe that we are not connected, that we are not playing a game – because it is our lives, our childrens lives that are at stake. Yet that is exactly what keeps the game playing itself – the investment of our lives, the fear of not surviving and the desperate comfort when we do.

So essentially there are two games being played on one chess board:  One is the earth with its cities and its cornfields and its oil rigs and its slave labor. The other takes place in the clouds of speculation, making up the rules as it’s goes along for the other game to provide the necessary fuel and finance to ensure that a few, a lucky few, remain the winners. These gamers take media, banking, wars and governments and shape them to fit their need. Everything that we see, everything we eat, every cent we give to charity is carefully calculated to ensure that the game keeps going. It is essential to the game that only a few knows how to play it. So the rules are made complex, requires special education that one can only achieve by investing oneself in the game – a network of gamers, that has been compiled through generation after generation , shell-company upon shell-company that seems endless and off the map. Brands with family names that project loyalty and sincerity, yet are transnational and not bound by any Principles or laws. But behind them are people, behind it all is always people. It is not an evil conspiracy, but it is the Human Nature of greed. And who of us can say that we would not ever have done the same, were we in their golden slippers or golf shoes today?

The point to get across is not the revolutionary notion of the proletariat fighting the evil bourgeoisie – but to understand that the game is kept going by all of us investing ourselves in the game, whether we like it or not, whether we know it or not. The nature of the game is to keep depleting the Earth, its animals and people, through a carefully orchestrated centrifugation of land, crops and oil. How it ends up being real money in the hands of real people, lies within the structure of our systems: our faith that banks are institutions of the people, that governments are institutions of the people, that corporations simply supply the demand of the people, that media serves the interests of the people. And so – we support, we participate; we live our lives, with pensions and debt and cravings for new merchandise to give us the feeling that we are getting somewhere, that we are moving up in the world. The farmer or factory worker in Nigeria or Cameroon has no chance of breaking the chain. The guys on top of the food chain have no interest in stopping the game. They are just as scared of loosing what they have as the rest. And in between are the rest of us. The middle-class that do no harm, the ones that are not responsible. We each live our lives, privately, separately, only meeting in banks, shops, churches, on game shows on TV or even on Facebook. Many of us see that something needs to change. Some place their fate in spirituality, in positive thinking and in the belief that everything happens for a reason. Cleaning the body, the soul, the earth has become a business of its own. Others want to fight the system, the rich, and the governments and unite in small groups of resistance, going ‘off the grid’ often based on feeling powerless and angry. A vast amount of people play computer games, smoke weed, drink or eat because they don’t know what else to do – and then there are those that embrace the system, exercise, build careers and families, believing in the progress of the Human race.

We all know that a change is required, yet we do not believe that we are the ones required to make it happen for whatever reason we make up for ourselves. It is the governments, the corporations, our parents, God’s, the system’s Responsibility – yet it is clear that none of these are capable of taking Responsibility within their current condition. What we do not see, and yet do see without admitting it to ourselves in full awareness of what that implies, is that our World is the Whole World and that these private lives and ‘worlds’ that we experience on a day to day basis, are based on this illusion of Separation and within this the fear of not surviving and the justification of competition with All other ‘parts’ of life as something ‘natural’ and unchangeable. It is supported by the delusion of ‘free-will’, which is really just a fancy word for self-enslavement – the master becoming his own slave and throwing away the key.  If we take a good, long, hard Self-Honest look at the World and ourselves within it, we will clearly see that the ‘free-will’ that we worship is determined by one thing only: Money. Thus we become our own slaves in the belief of ‘free-will’ as something real – willing to give up everything, to sell ourselves, to become workers pretending to work towards ‘self-realization’ within a career as the main purpose of our lives, most of us secretively desiring to be somewhere else, to be someone else, yet not even able to admit that to ourselves having accepted this basic self-deception of ‘free-will’, determined by the silent taboo of money.

When do you ever hear people talking about money? Really talking about money? We would say; “everyday, all the time” – but that is not so. People talk about survival, about the game of survival, either in frustration or relief or brag about their ability to survive. We do not talk about what is behind money, what we, through the symbol of money, and what money to re-present, have done to ourselves. Some will see it and they will see that what is required is to stop the money-system entirely. But what they are not seeing is that the blame and thus the Responsibility for this condition is placed outside Self – trying to fix the illness by making the symptoms go away – be that money, the system, the government or god. We have allowed money to be the re-presentation of ourselves as individuals and as a whole – dis-playing before our very eyes on an everyday basis, the cruelty and the absurdity of the game we play. It is obvious that if we are playing a game without knowing the rules, we never had a chance of winning in the first place. But if the game cannot continue without us playing, knowing the rules or not – we cannot stand by say that we are not Equally Responsible. The question is thus if we dare changing the rules of the game and even more so: what will happen when we do?

Within the Equality Equation of One plus One being two, it is clear to see that it is possible to change the course of the World through a simple Application of Common Sense. This is not about ideological or life-style politics, it is not about debating between a socialist or capitalist society – It is the Basic Common Sense Realization that we All Participate Equally in this World, though through a System based on Inequality and Separation, a flaw in the Equation that can be solved through the Application of Principle above preference, but where some are in a position currently to make a difference, while others are not. It is those of us who are in a position to make a difference that has the first Responsibility to do so – but that also means the Responsibility to sort out our own miss-calculations and Inequality equations within whatever we Participate within and as, inside ourselves as well as in our daily life experiences, as the One plus One plus One plus One – that can Change the game of Survival to a Life in Equality of All Beings – a Life where we can finally start having fun and play together instead of fighting each other in the delusion of separation and survival that was never more Real than what we have Allowed it to be. Support The Equal Money System to End All Inequality Equations through Self-Responsibility For All as One as Equal as Life.