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reacting to our own mindWe react to the mind in many ways. We may fear what comes up in our minds or wonder where it came from or we may entertain it and immerse ourselves within it. Reacting to the mind is quite like reacting to the things we see happening in the world, except for the fact that what is happening in the world is real, tangible and physical, while what happens in our minds is more of a ‘pseudo-reality’, because although it IS happening, it isn’t something real or substantial. When we react to things we see in the world, we might yell at the TV to no avail but it can also be much more subtle, where we react to traits we see in other people with disgust or disdain where we promptly state within ourselves that “I’m not like that!” while our reaction reveals otherwise – because we only react to that which is unresolved or not faced within ourselves. Reacting to our own reactions is no different. We employ various strategies to NOT face what we see inside ourselves: denial, excuses, justifications, blame, self-judgment, and suppression. Anything that takes the focus away from us facing ourselves in brutal and direct self-honesty and immediately take responsibility for what we see to take it upon ourselves to change and correct ourselves. If we knew and saw exactly what is happening in the world with open eyes and within that acted in self-responsibility to change it, we wouldn’t react. It is the same when we react to what comes up in/through our minds. Something that comes up within us that shocks us or makes us want to suppress ourselves indicates that this is a point we hadn’t yet directed, faced and taken responsibility for. Sometimes we might also react because we had created a belief about ourselves that doesn’t fit with what’s now coming up/out of us – which exactly what we’re seeing in the world as well; when we see horrible things happening, we promptly take distance from it, judge it and dissociate ourselves from it, not admitting that whatever other human beings are doing to each other, to animals or themselves is something that exists equally within us. We might have grown up under different conditions or with different rules, we might face a less harsh daily reality that allows us to live more civilized, but at the end of the day we are all the same – and whatever happens on this earth is our equal responsibility, whether we want to admit it or not. It’s not going to go away by us taking a moral stance of disassociation. Nothing will change unless we actively direct it to change through self-responsibility.

Self-Forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to what comes up in/through my mind, because I don’t like what I see and I would prefer not to be associated with what I see as it collides with an image I have of myself that I would like to preserve to feel good about myself

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize that if my image of myself and my self-definition is contingent upon me denying parts of myself, then it surely cannot be real or ‘who I am’ in fact

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the way to deal with to parts of myself that I don’t like, that I fear and that I would prefer to not associate myself with, is to stash them away, avoid them, shun them, deny and suppress them – exactly as we as society shun and stash away homeless people or how we hide our factory farming from the public

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not question why I react to my own reactions, to seeing ‘who’ and ‘what’ I have accepted and allowed myself to become within and as the mind, because within that moment of seeing my own reactions, I immerse myself fully into the reaction to what I see and go into fear or self-judgment or disgust not realizing that ‘who I am’ as I see my reactions isn’t real as I am reacting to one dimension of my mind from within another dimension of my mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the only reason I would be reacting to my own reactions and to what I see in my mind is that I haven’t faced or stood equal to myself as what I see and within that that I haven’t taken self-responsibility for myself as what I see

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel shocked and dismayed towards what’s coming up in/through my mind within an experience that I don’t recognize myself thinking that “This is not who I am” and “I don’t know where this is coming from” as though the thoughts/reactions/experiences are appearing out of the blue, like being possessed by a foreign entity – thus indicating that the reactions are aspects of myself that I have separated and disassociated myself from within and through creating a self-dishonest image and definition of myself and so I feel ‘shocked’ because I am facing a reality of myself that I had hidden from myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto a moral judgment against the mind and within that a moral judgment against ‘negative qualities’ of being human like greed, lust, envy, violence, selfishness that I believe I must avoid and suppress to get rid of when in fact this is all an entire interconnected system where I lock myself into these aspects by keeping them secret, while presenting myself positively to myself and others through my conscious mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize and admit to myself that nothing comes up within/through my mind without it already existing within and as me through on my permission, acceptance of participation within it and as such that I am responsible for and the creator of what comes up within me, whether indirectly or directly

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize or consider how, when something comes up within/through my mind that I don’t recognize or understand, it simply means that I haven’t equalized myself to that aspect of my mind/myself and that I now have to walk a process of investigating that aspect to understand it in detail and specificity so that I can effectively direct myself to change and correct myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that reacting to my own reactions only perpetuate me to react even more and that I in no way deal with the initial reactions or take responsibility for myself within and as them by reacting to them

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not place a guard in front of my mouth to ensure that I don’t speak within/through reactions and I forgive myself that I have instead used and abused speaking to further cement myself into a reaction, becoming and accepting myself as the reaction

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that when I react to something that I see in the world that is unacceptable or horrible or atrocious that it makes me a better person because I react, showing and indicating that I’ve got compassion – when in fact it is only within that moment of seeing that I ‘care’ when I in every other moment don’t have the slightest care or concern for what’s happening because I’m completely enthralled in my own self-interest and do absolutely nothing actively to change the situation except for these momentary reactions

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with a negative experience like shock, dismay, anger, blame, moral judgment or sadness to the horrors happening in the world – or in my mind – is the same as caring and that by going into this reaction I have ’done enough’ and ’taken a stand’ when in fact I have done nothing but make myself feel better so that I can go back to suppressing and lying to myself pretending to the something and someone that I am not while real caring would be to act, to take self-responsibility for what I see

Self-Corrective Statement

When and as I see myself reacting to what comes up in/as/through my mind as reactions and thoughts – I stop and I breathe and I apply the correction of immediately moving myself to the solution of investigating what I see in unconditional self-acceptance, embracing myself as the mind, as what I see in equality within the commitment to take responsibility for myself. Because I realize that the only reason that I react to what comes up in/as/through my mind, is because it is a part/aspect of myself that I have denied/suppressed/separated myself from, which is why I don’t ‘recognize’ it as myself or why I refuse to admit that ‘this is a part of me’. And I realize that this is exactly the same we as human beings are doing in the world-system where we go into reactions and moral judgments towards the atrocities that are happening in the world, because we within that separate ourselves from what we see as ourselves and thereby abdicate responsibility. As such I make a commitment to face myself and embrace myself and accept myself as everything and anything that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to be and become – yet not in an unconditional context of accepting it as who I am, but to accept that ‘this is what I have accepted and allowed’, ‘this is who I’ve accepted myself to be’ and within this I commit myself to take responsibility for what I see, for what comes up in/as/through the mind because I realize that nothing can exist within me that isn’t ‘mine’, that isn’t ‘me’ in the context of what and who I’ve created myself as and as such whatever comes up IS my responsibility. And I also realize that suppression, moral judgment and pushing aspects of myself away or in the world system taking a distance from certain parts of human existence is not an effective way to deal with things, because within that I am abdicating responsibility and thereby allowing these things to continue existing as is without doing anything to change them. So – I commit myself to take responsibility for myself as the mind and within that to change and correct myself through a practical process of self-introspection through writing and self-forgiveness and to take directive action to practically change who I am within my living.

Investigate Desteni, investigate the forum where on is invited to write oneself out in self-honesty and where any questions regarding the Desteni Material will be answered by Destonians who are walking their own process. Visit the Destonian Network where videos and blogs are streamed daily. Suggest to also check out the Desteni I Process and Relationship courses as well as the FREE DIP Lite course

 

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