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Does the Desteni group force its members to shave their heads, cut all ties with their family and friends and give all their money to Bernard Poolman? Are the members of Desteni vulnerable teenagers who are easily persuaded by the promise of money and a life without feelings and emotions? Does being part of the Desteni group and living on the Desteni farm include sexual orgies and arranged marriages?

Several websites, blogs and Youtube videos claim that the above statements are true such as within the following example from the website cultwatch:

”Desteni is a centralized regime run as a dictatorship which advocates strictly regimented economic, industrial and social controls. It suppresses free speech and forcibly attempts to censor criticism and opposition. Its extensive use of propaganda utilizes democratic procedures for an antidemocratic cause. ‘Destonians’ condemn non-Destonians as less than inferior beings. “

Now – I am here at the Desteni farm and I am going to give you an exclusive inside perspective into the Desteni group and I will expose whether or not the above mentioned ‘facts’ are true or not. Because if you research Desteni on Google you will most likely come across ‘articles’ and blog posts and videos similar to the above mentioned examples. So I am here to shed some light on what actually goes on within the Desteni group and on the Desteni farm that is seldomly mentioned on any of these sites.

Let’s begin with examining the quote above.

Desteni is not a centralized regime run as a dictatorship. If it were I wouldn’t be here writing this blog-post at my own volition – which I obviously can’t prove that I am. So you have to decide – whether you will take the word of people who have never actually investigated Desteni or whether you will be willing to hear what I have to say with the ‘risk’ that I might be writing this with a gun pointed to my head. That’s up to you.

I can inform you that when the quote above refers to suppression of ‘freedom of speech’ this ‘impression’ directly stems from the fact that we at Desteni have decided not to engage in arguments with haters and people only out to slander the group. I therefore for example have ‘comment approval’ set on all my Youtube videos which means that I have control over who gets to comment on my videos and which comments I will accept or not. Now – the reason why I have to decided to do this is not so that I can filter the comments and only keep those that are ‘positive’ towards Desteni. I have done so because I was receiving a massive amount of comments from people who were either directly abusive or who were deliberately playing mind-games with no other purpose than to argue for the sake of arguing. The directly abusive comments include death threats and explicit verbally sexual abuse in the most obscene manner you can imagine. From my perspective my Youtube channel is like my virtual ‘house’ or ‘home’. As such I decide that I won’t accept or allow abuse on my channel, because I wouldn’t accept or allow it from myself – so why should I accept or allow it from anyone else? I mean, would you allow people to walse into your home and give you death-threats or make sexually nasty remarks or even to come into your home and start an argument with you just for the sake of arguing? NO! So obviously I don’t allow it in my Youtube channel either. And apparently this is limiting the freedom of speech of others – which I might add – often are the people who spew abusive comments. So there you have it – they want their ‘freedom’ to abuse and for others to listen to or participate in their bullshit and then they get affronted when we at Desteni shut the door in their virtual faces and say: No more, Enough!

Let’s have a look at another section of the quote: “‘Destonians’ condemn non-Destonians as less than inferior beings. “ Now this is obviously absurd and goes to show the length of slandering that the people writing these blog-posts will go to. In fact at Desteni we go to great lengths – or let me rephrase that: we go to an absolute length to place ourselves in the shoes of others equal and one – and within this obviously Destonians are exactly the same as everyone else. We are all equally people contaminated by a delusional inflated mind-reality completely enveloped in self-interest and that is what we work on, each in our own process, to take self-responsibility and stop projecting our own shit onto others. So if we for a moment play with the possibility of this quote above being written in sincerity and not as a deliberate point of slander, what it actually says is that Destonians won’t simply accept bullshit from other people. What this means is that the person has taken something that was being said personally and have perceived this as being a display of arrogance or superiority. We’re so used to giving each other space to abuse that when someone comes along and says: “wait a minute, this is unacceptable!” – it is immediately frowned upon as being arrogant.

Another quote within this blog-post shows exactly how malignant and misinformed these people are within their starting-point of writing these blogs:

“The ideas Destonians have acquired from Poolman and Spies are such that, for example, they regard friendship as ‘evil’, the family as the foundation of prostitution and cause of pornography, they say people who have sexual fantasies cause others to become rapists, humanity is possessed by ‘mind demons’ and that the only hope for the future of humankind is through ‘self-forgiveness’ in Desteni.”

Okay – so let me make one thing absolutely crystal clear. Desteni does not regard friendships as evil. Desteni does not tell people that they can’t have friends or that they should cut ties with their families. On the contrary. What I have witnessed through the five years I have walked with Desteni is the establishment of health, effective relationships with families and friends. I can use my own example: before walking with Desteni, I had a conflicted relationship towards my family and especially my sister. I had basically cut all ties with her and I was prepared to never again have anything to do with her. Through walking with Desteni within the process of developing self-honesty and self-responsibility through writing, I started to write about my sister and my conflicted relationship with her. I wrote a 200 page long mind-construct which is a specific technique of writing developed by the Desteni I Process team based on people’s experiences with various methods of utilizing writing to develop oneself and through that I discovered that all the conflicting experiences I had towards my sister was actually something that I had created myself in my own mind – literally through one memory from when I was a child. After I had written out all the points, I went to see my sister. Because I wanted to test for myself whether or not writing out this mind-construct would actually change anything in my relationship to her. And I was astounded to see that everything had changed. When I talked to her I didn’t have any of the reactions I would normally have. I was able to simply be there and enjoy myself and communicate with her as two human beings without any personal history influencing how I saw her or how I experienced myself. And something interesting happened. My sister went from being apprehensive and cautious towards me – which she has been for years – to actually enjoying being with me and laughing together. I had virtually given up creating any form of relationship with my sister; I had pushed her away and simply pushed my experiences towards her in the background. I had suppressed them within me, but they didn’t go away. Why? Because I hadn’t taken responsibility for myself within it and how I was the creator of the experiences I had towards my sister. I know for a fact that there are many Destonians with similar experiences. Parents have seen their children change from depressed youngsters with drugs or alcohol problems to responsible young men and women who are serious about taking an education or getting a job. Husbands and wives have seen partners change and become more patient, more understanding and less resentful and blaming. Friends have seen each other change into people of integrity and dignity – people you can talk to and have an honest and authentic conversation with.

And for your information in case you were wondering: I shaved my head because I wanted to, not because someone told me to. And I kept it shaved for two years because I wanted to. Others didn’t shave at all and others again kept it shaved. It astounds me how much value people who are intent on defaming can place on something so insignificant as the hair on your head.

This quote above and the entire ‘article’ goes out of its way to make Desteni sound ‘dirty’ and ‘crazy’ and no where does it say whether this person has actually read any of our blogs or watched our videos. If you have seen the movie with Eminem, the “8.Mile” you’ll probably remember the scene, the last battle where Eminem precedes what the other rapper Papa Doc, in the battle is going to say about him. So he says everything ‘bad’ about himself and it leaves the other rapper speechless because he doesn’t have any ‘fuel’ left to hit him with.

In a way you could say that that’s what we’ve done at Desteni. This is also why I can say for a fact that there’s nothing these haters can say that has any substantial value. Because there’s nothing to come after. And so what they’ll do is that they will take what we are saying and deliberately spin it in such a way that it sounds ‘dirty’ or ‘conspicuous’ like in the quote above where they quote Desteni for saying that people are possessed by mind-demons. Seriously, what else do you call it when a mother in China recently suddenly in a fit of rage stabbed her baby boy multiple times in the face because he bit on to her breast while feeding? What else do you call it when parents kill their children or when men burry their partners alive in jealousy? Isn’t it appropriate to say that people are possessed by mental demonic ‘entities’?

I am not going to go through the rest of the blog-post here. Because it is basically just more of the same. You should get the point by now. If you do however look at the words, the way it is written – there is absolutely nothing sincere about them. There is instead a distinct undertone of sensationalism and gossip that completely undermines any attempt at discrediting the Desteni group or what we are about. If you look at my words or the words of other Destonians what do you see?

I stand as a living example of the effectiveness of the Desteni group. Through walking with Desteni I have become so much more than I could have ever imagined in my life. And here I am not talking about abstract, delusional or ‘brainwashed’ apparent qualities that Desteni has coaxed me into believing in. No, I am talking about real life skills and qualities. Through walking with Desteni I have stopped smoking weed after many years of addiction. I have stopped participating in self-abuse and wasting my life through partying and hooking up with random people. I am in a committed relationship with a partner where we live and work together now on the third year. I have finished a master’s degree with the highest grades and I am working in a stable job in a different country. When I come home from work, I start my Desteni ‘work-day’ which lasts throughout the night. In this space of time I write my blogs such as the one you are reading right now. I do my assignments within the Desteni I Process and Agreement Course – not because anyone has told me to but because I know that I owe it to myself and to everyone else to sort my mind out and become a dignified and self-responsible human being that lives in self-integrity and who can be trusted with others to act in a way that is best for all. I support others on the Desteni forum through sharing with them the insights and realizations I have gained throughout the years. I read books and watch documentaries about the state the world is in. And there is so much more I am not yet doing or that I am still not satisfied with – and these are the points that I push. I furthermore allocate a specific amount of money each month to Desteni, some to purchase the interviews that are available on Eqafe and some to pay for the two courses I am currently walking. I do this out of support of the group and myself. No one has asked me to do it. No one is forcing me to do it. And I am still able to live comfortably and buy the things I want and need in my daily life. And I don’t receive any money from Desteni at all. All earnings I make from being a Desteni I Process agent goes back to the group as well as my earnings from Eqafe that I receive through being an affiliate. This is a decision I have made for myself and not anything anyone has told me to do. I am doing it because I am in the fortunate position of being able to do it and because I want to support the group as much as possible. So as you can see, there’s nothing to come after for the haters. I live a legit life. I pay my taxes. I talk to my family. I go out from time to time with my co-workers. And I do all of that while I participate with Desteni and while I walk my own process. I haven’t lost anything of significance since I started walking with Desteni. I have only gained so much more than I could have ever imagined. I dare you to walk a day in my shoes before you make claims about Desteni or what we are about. It might change your life if you’d let it.

I invite you to watch the following video to gain some insights into what a ‘normal’ day looks like at the Desteni farm:


Investigate Desteni, investigate the forum where on is invited to write oneself out in self-honesty and where any questions regarding the Desteni Material will be answered by Destonians who are walking their own process. Visit the Destonian Network where videos and blogs are streamed daily. Suggest to also check out the Desteni I Process and Relationship courses as well as the FREE DIP Lite course