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“You will also note that those that are possessed by love will refuse to consider anything else but that love is the answer –and there will be no practical way they can explain how love will change the world and regardless of this obvious oversight, their egos will spew one word like magic poison — ‘love will heal the world’ — they should watch the news to see that the only love on the Telly is the love the corporations are promoting as love for their products.” – Bernard Poolman

In this post I am going to share a brief expansion on two comments that I received on the previous blog-posts I wrote about the insanity of falling in love.

Comment 1

“Funny that no one has yet to comment. Perhaps it is that the post is quite a bit foreboding for those of us who like to believe we have a soul mate, etc. The tone is also reflective of our ability to rationalize ourselves right out of any chance of ‘true’ love. As modern beings we pride ourselves in our ego and doubt-love always remains an elusive mystery just out of grasp. Or is it? Perhaps, to the contrary, the conclusion remains that the love that results in paranoid or crazed states is only true if love is unrequited or thought to be as such. Such love of a lifetime requires equal measure of courage and desires, and I don’t think there is any doubt when one finds such a love that is a misconception of paranoia… an obsession, perhaps justifiably so.”

Comment 2

“So, what are your thoughts? Do you believe in the theory that everyone has One True Love? Does one Fall in Love or is that merely infatuation/obsession, or lust? What makes some have one relationship after another, while others rarely have any? What makes Ppl innately attracted to a certain person only to have those same traits drive you nuts down the road?”

To the second comment I replied:

 “Falling in love is an energetic experience that can disappear as quickly as it comes. It isn’t based on any real, physical or substantial essence. People fall in love with their idea about who/how other people are as well as their own experience of themselves when someone is infatuated with them. What makes us attracted to certain people is based on memories of character and physical traits that we’ve created a positive experience towards as well as traits that we would want to posses for ourselves. So we believe that by being with this person we’ll get ‘access’ to that specific expression or point but then if the relationship ends, they’ll ‘take it’ with them. It’s really not very practical.”

Now a specific word that stood out as I read the first comment is the word ‘foreboding.’ It sounds a lot like ‘forbidden’ or ‘forbidding’ – which is interesting in context to the subject that we’re discussing here as it would indicate that what I’ve written about love is considered ‘forbidden’ (or taboo) to those professing ‘true love’.

Now – if we look at the dictionary definition of the word ‘foreboding’ it means the following:

“foreboding |fɔːˈbəʊdɪŋ|

noun [ mass noun ]

a feeling that something bad will happen; fearful apprehension: with a sense of foreboding she read the note.


implying that something bad is going to happen: when the Doctor spoke, his voice was dark and foreboding.

So if we merge the two definitions of ‘foreboding’, my first association to the word ‘forbidden’ with the dictionary definition of ‘foreboding’ being a feeling that something bad is going to happen we see the following point emerge:

When we in our minds have settled on a certain set of beliefs/ideas/assumptions about life it can be very difficult to change, most often because we will define and live our lives according to these beliefs and as such we will literally hang out lives up upon these beliefs and therefore hang on to them at all costs because if we were to question them or their validity, the foundation upon which we’re living could/would disappear before our feet and we might realize that we’ve been living on a lie our entire lives. We might realize that we’ve compromised and sacrificed ourselves, our lives and even our relationships with other people for the sake of chasing after an illusion that we convinced ourselves to be real.

And this is not even only the case when it comes to love as an illusion we’re convincing ourselves is real  – it is virtually and quite literally our entire life that is build upon a foundation of lies. And so we have within our minds installed ‘warning signs’ and ‘firewalls’ through which we can protect the lies that we are living which is literally why certain topics or points will seem to be ‘forbidden’ or taboo. We will accordingly activate experiences of resistance and ‘danger’ towards that which we perceive to be ‘threatening’ the foundation upon which we’ve build our lives – for instance in relation to love and whether or not love is real.

“In a world where flesh is our mirror, the love we show for all living beings in flesh is certainly not love. The mental show with which we justify the feeling of love while the mirror of flesh shows the dishonesty, is the way of the lie. The living world as flesh on earth shows only that hate has become reality and is spreading fast as more and more find themselves without physical support. What human could possibly promote a feeling of love when the flesh of love do not represent this love in action? Self honesty as the living flesh is the most difficult thing that exist and will mirror who is here as Life and who is here as mental energy Ego.” – Bernard Poolman

Throughout my life I’ve literally been a ‘love monger’. If anyone believed wholeheartedly in love, it was I. However through the assistance of others who have ‘seen the light’ or rather the ‘darkness’ of who and what we’ve as humanity become I’ve come to realize how extensive an illusion our fantasy of love is. And nothing has confirmed this more than me now living in the most committed, real and rewarding relationship that I’ve ever been in in my life. And much to the surprise of people believing in ‘true love’ this relationship is not founded upon any form of ‘love’ experience. We are simply two people who have decided to walk this life together based on a practical consideration of our compatibility and based on having taken several years to even develop the relationship, which to my surprise we’ve only really just gotten started with.

What emerges when we dare to question the illusion of ‘true love’ and see behind the veil of romance and fairytales is the truth of what we as human beings are doing here on earth. Because for me – and for many others – love was what made sense to the world. Love was what made life worth it, even when it wasn’t worth it. It was like a light at the end of the tunnel, a promise of a ‘loving universe’ that in spite of all the nasty things going on, on earth could give meaning to the madness. So when you take that love away, what you are left with is: the madness. The cold, hard truth of ourselves which is that there is no higher meaning to life as we’ve created it, there is no ‘loving universe’, just like there is no ‘loving god’ pulling the strings in a way that is so advanced that we simply don’t get it.

What is here is who we are as human beings embedded within and as the mind and the physical consequences that this relationship causes on a daily basis in our lives and in the lives of everyone else. When we realize that there is no love that the love we dreamed up isn’t real – we are faced with reality. And just like with religion and spirituality, that is what we’re actively preventing ourselves from seeing, through such mechanisms of generating ‘foreboding’ experiences within ourselves.

So when and as we find ourselves reacting to a certain point within and as a feeling of ‘don’t go there!’ where there is no sign of any physical threat – it is vital to investigate if we through such an experience are preventing ourselves from facing the reality of what is here – as ourselves and as the world as a whole.

Because ironically – it is through such relationships of feverishly holding on to illusions and delusions that we’re maintaining the status quo of the world and actually are creating anything but what love was supposed to be in this world. And just as ironically, it is through letting go of these delusions that we can begin facing what is here in fact, in and as this physically manifested reality and actually create a world where we don’t have to live on lies and protect our lies through all kinds of loops and plots.

We have literally been brainwashed to use love as a veil through which we’re preventing ourselves to see and face – and change – the reality of ourselves and what is here.

“Love is only real where equality is real. And what is equality? Equality is love thy neighbour as thy self, do unto another what you want them to do to you.

And love in itself is perfection, and equality is perfection. Therefore, love as equality is the drive to perfection. It is the exposure of all deception, no matter what.
The stop of stopping of all inequality. Inequality is where one allows, in your mind, secret thoughts about others that are deception. That is ‘evil’. That is not ‘love’. It is judgmental, it is forming opinions about others.

Love as equality is when in your mind, you’re working towards standing up as the perfection within yourself and everyone else. And that you make sure it happens through the principle of: tough love. Where ever inequality or deception or judgement or any form of limitation is allowed= you immediately expose it. And you insist on actions that reflects, and that is the actuality of ‘love thy neighbours as thy self’, in all ways.
You change the systems, from education to monetary to governmental – all, the total social systems – to one of Equality. Because then your system is a system of love. Because then you love thy neighbour. There should not be any being that profess to be spiritual in nature, that has any problem with equality. Because then you have never really loved.” – Bernard Poolman

Suggested reading for expanded perspectives on the delusion and illusion of Love:

How can love exist

Day 414: Love and Light Paranoia: a Disease Cultivated by Consumerism

Day 19 – Rotten Love

Day 163: After Death Communication – Relationships and Love – Part 12 

 Day 9: Speaking from the Heart

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